This is
a story about life and how it shapes us, to make us who we are. I recently left
my job without having anything lined up on February 20th, 2015. With
that being said it is the most uncharacteristic thing I have ever done. I
understand life is not perfect, we are not perfect, but we can make moves and choices
that directly affect our quality of life! Sometimes we have choices and can
make changes; they may not happen overnight. Is our life just the outcome of
thousands of daily decisions? How hard we work, how much we sleep, how much we exercise
and how healthy we eat? I was told once in college that “Success is the
management of our opportunities”; I believe there is much truth in that
statement. Others might say “Success is where preparation and opportunity meet”
or “Success is where luck and preparation meet.” Everyone has their own definition
of success, it is a subjective thing. What does it mean to be successful? I
always think about these things at 3am for some reason. There are people in the
world that struggle to feed their children, provide income just to pay the
bills each month and maybe have enough for extras, but they feel
successful! Now and then I hear people talking enthusiastically about their job
and want to know where that amazing place is! That’s when I realize that we all
have our own definition. Last week I met a nurse that went back to school at
the age of 45, because she was tired of working odd jobs and not having stable
employment. She is now doing great and much more stable. She said it was hard,
but possible. She made a change at 45, why am I so worried about who I will
become at 30 years of age? I stay up many nights and think about people from
the past, history repeats itself right? Cicero said, “To be ignorant of what
occurred before you were born is to always remain a child.” I think about people
like Jesus, Alexander the Great, Lincoln, Booker T. Washington, Grant, Louie
Zamperini, Marcus Luttrell, Adam Brown, Schindler, Theodore Roosevelt, Napoleon
Hill, Mandela, Dale Carnegie, Philip Petit, Sargent York, William Wallace (the
real one) and many many more. What made them different? Why are people still
learning about them and how did they influence the world? This may be off
track, welcome to my mind. I watched a credit card commercial the other day
that was called, “The Journey Never Stops”. It explains some of these stories
below. My point is that you will fail, and that’s okay. A single trait that can
turn failure into success is resilience, the ability to learn from a trial and
come back strong.
In our lives we will be tested
continually, whether we are being evaluated throughout is up for discussion. We
will all face trials, and this is as sure as death and taxes. As much as we
might worry and prepare, we can never predict the events that will take place. This
is not an amazing story of survival or living in the gutter, but you might be
able to relate to my trials. I used to be jealous of my grandpas because they
were so sure of themselves. They were so smart and seemed to have made all the
right choices their entire lives! This was not true of course. When I found out
my grandpa Turnbough dropped a math class, I was floored and thought about it
for a week! He was a mathematical genius and he failed at one point in his
life? I later realized their life is what made them who they were and the
experiences had shaped them into great men. I just turned thirty and am being
“shaped” as you read this. One thing I found out in my late teens is that we
ALL WILL fail, how we respond can make all the difference. Garth Brooks was
told multiple times that he should pursue something besides music. Lincoln
failed at more things than he succeeded in. Oprah and Steve Jobs were fired at
different points in their career. Bill Gates tried to start a company and
failed, the first time. These people were resilient in the face of adversity.
When I was in high school I was
unsure of just about everything in my life, except that I had a great family.
At the end of my senior year I decided, I guess I’ll take the ACT and apply for
the local community college. I had met with recruiters from the Marine Corps
and taken tests to see what I might be placed for. My ACT score was a low 18;
it seemed my shop, weightlifting and hall monitor classes didn’t prepare me
very well my 12th year of schooling. My score from the Marines was
pretty sad also. I was voted “Most likely to become a comedian” and “Best
Personality” in my yearbook, but the Marines didn’t seem to care about that
either. My grandpa Turnbough told me, “go to school for three years and then do
whatever you want.” He had seen suffering and death first hand fighting the
Germans in the 1940s, he didn’t want that for me. My grandpa Rabbitt on the
other hand said joining the Marines was one of the best decisions he made in his
life. He fought in the Pacific on some of the most written about islands during
the war, including Iwo Jima. I knew my grandfathers changed their destiny by
attending college in the late 1940s. My grandpa Rabbitt became a lawyer and
provided for twelve children, my grandpa Turnbough became a prominent
mechanical chief engineer that travelled North America and Europe. This seemed
to be the easy choice in 2003, I joined the masses at St. Louis Community
College. It was an easy transition and some of the best teachers I have ever had
to this day. My main interests were lifestyle change for the unhealthy
populations and wildlife conservation, not exactly similar. I chose to focus on
health because the “job outlook” in 2003 was better. After entering the
community college with a high school mentality, I dropped my first math class
that my grandpa offered to help me with daily; I would lose my grandpa that
year. I was 19 years old and something inside me would change forever, I should
have taken his help. I joked around less, I became more serious and spent most
of my time in the library. I became somewhat of a reader, something my dad
always said was extremely beneficial for anyone. He was correct, of course. I
pursued school with a relentless vigor and would have a GPA between 3.7-3.9 for
the rest of my school years. I finished my college years at twenty-five, earning
a Master’s of Education in Exercise Physiology. Losing my grandpa was the
biggest tragedy of my life, the biggest psychological trial. It introduced God
into my life and changed my urgency and mentality on almost every endeavor. I
think about my grandpa every single day and in most things I do. I hope to be a
man like him, extremely humble and extremely competent. Although falling short
stressed me out there is something I repeated in my head to bring me peace, “If
I honestly did my best in that situation, then I shouldn’t have any regrets.”
I
finished my Bachelors of Science in Kinesiology in 2008. I was grateful to be
hired full time by Washington University School of Medicine! I was working for
Dr. Dennis Villareal, studying the effects of exercise, diet and education on
the frail/elderly/obese population. I did testing, instructing, data entry and much
more. I prayed about going back to school or looking to get on a different
government grant in research (2008-09 were not the best funding years). It was
a great experience working with very intelligent people. I said that if a door
is opened I will walk through it. I was accepted into graduate school and was
chosen for an assistantship at SIUE. I created and taught classes, did anything
my mentor wanted and gained many skills in leadership and completing objectives.
My path from there was a PhD or to leave academia and work in the field. I had
a prolonged period of unemployment and it was a big wake up call. Looking for a
job seemed like a full time job, it was challenging and exhausting. It is a
feeling between determination, hopelessness and adventure. After much prayer,
patience and four interviews, I got a job at a high end personal training
facility. I really enjoyed working with my clients and watching their quality
of life improve quickly. To be honest I was frustrated that a highschool
graduate with a personal training certification could make the same as me, and
not owe tens of thousands of dollars in college loans. Many exercise physiology
jobs were consolidated and nurses took on the tasks; specifically in cardiac
rehab, weight management and clinical research. Rightly so, nurses earn their
living I know that for a fact. I was able to observe in an operating room to
watch a double bypass, the nurses did about 95% of the work! I personal trained
for one year and didn’t feel the schedule fit my lifestyle. I woke up at 4am
most days and went home between 7-8pm. There were some mornings I set the alarm
off at 4:45am while opening the building. I worked with some amazing
individuals that had a unique drive and more energy than most. I was falling
asleep at stop lights, overusing energy drinks and struggled to keep Sundays
off for myself. A strange fact is that during this time in my life, I had
dreams there was a large dark figure standing in the corner of my bedroom
staring at me. All I could see was its eyes, then it would jump across the room
and put all of its weight on my chest. Every single time I exhaled while lying
in bed, it would push further, not allowing a single breath in. I would wake up
gasping for air! I don’t ever try to interpret my dreams but that was just a
strange period in my life I suppose.
Once I decided that the job was not
for me, it was time to make some serious decisions. Up to this point it, I had
almost every single job fall in my lap. All my past employers vouched for me
and I had a previous boss say that I was nineteen going on forty in 2004. I
took all my tasks and objectives extremely serious, sometimes people made fun
of me for that. After my first year at SIUE, I was asked how many times I had
been to “town” (Edwardsville, IL); my answer was twice. My classmate said,
“maybe you need to get out of the library and stop hiking alone in the woods
all the time?” Anyways, I interviewed at Washington University via skype with a
brilliant doctor in Italy. We kept interrupting each other because of the delay
across the Atlantic Ocean! I had an interview at a local YMCA to be the
“Director of Fitness”, I had every qualification except management experience. I applied and had a phone interview with a
weight management clinic at a local hospital. I was not chosen for any of the
positions and needed to re-evaluate my situation again. I knew I really wanted
the weekends off for my outdoor adventures that keep me happy. I knew that I
didn’t want the schedule I had personal training and that I did enjoy working
with people. Many of my classmates were not using their degree and had either
gone back to school or changed careers fields. I thought about every possible
option as if I were playing chess. I knew a change is something I had to make.
I found
it hard initially to take rejection because I wasn’t used to it. It seemed that
I achieved most things I strived for and most people generally liked me, why
not give me a chance? Did I look sloppy or say something wrong? Remember
assumptions are an extremely dangerous thing. I later found out that you don’t
always succeed the first time. After much prayer and effort, I was given a lead
through a friend at church. An industrial rental company needed a service assistant.
I felt I was wasting my education, I was letting my family down or going
through life aimlessly. When I met the managers, they asked if I was okay with
working Monday through Friday 7am-3:30pm, I almost started laughing in front of
the director of operations. I had prayed about hours and income, they offered
exactly what I wanted to the dollar and hour, it gave me goosebumps. The only
thing missing on my resume and something I prayed about was management or
leadership opportunities. They said they didn’t care what my degree was in, I
was willing to work hard and learn. I was immersed into a work culture I had
never seen, people enjoyed it for the most part. My first work function was the
Christmas party. The owners of the company stood at the front door with their
wives shaking everyone’s hands, then carried h’ordeurves around for their
employees like waiters! The bosses were friendly and genuinely interested in
their employee’s lives, it was incredible. I found myself going from being on
my feet all day to sitting all day at a computer, big change. I balanced that
out with 5am workout sessions at the gym, which was one block east. I asked the
director of operations for tips on being successful, he then asked if I have
read How to Win Friends and Influence
People by Dale Carnegie? I had read it but not in a completely focused
state. I was a bigger fan of Think and
Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. Both of these books are STILL top selling
business books that were written in 1937. When our company was bought by a
construction giant from Europe, they offered to pay for tuition up to $2500/yr.
I found a Dale Carnegie class in St. Louis and signed up immediately. The
leader of the class was Chris Kroeger, an amazing instructor that practices was
he preaches. He truly is an example of what Dale Carnegie was trying to
communicate.
With
time I was promoted to service manager. I worked with a lot of great people
that worked hard and accomplished more things than I thought was possible. I
was slowly introduced into the management role and there was fair amount of
corporate steps to take as well. I was nervous and excited to have the
opportunity to be in charge of 32 million dollars of equipment and 13 men. This
is exactly what I prayed for three years earlier and it fell in my lap, I
worked hard to earn it also. We were bought again by a giant merger/acquisition
company from California and things changed again. We went through many software
changes and process changes, it was a good challenge on learning new things
fast. When managing 13 men you are managing time cards, discipline, vacations,
injuries and disputes. I’m sure there were things I could have done better, but
I cannot say I didn’t try my best. Remember my phrase from earlier? If you
honestly try your best you have nothing to regret, keep moving! To mention a few
tasks: I was reconciling 5 credit cards, doing daily timecards, processing
invoices, taking all customer calls for service, dispatching four mechanics,
stocking and ordering RMO supplies, researching parts for repairs, managing
open purchase orders, managing all field and billable workorders ,leading the
division in warranty revenue, managing the unavailable percentage of 32 million
dollars in industrial equipment, implementing new rules and processes daily,
managing building repairs, maintaining vendor relationships and pricing, always
striving to make my men know they are respected, manufacturer rebates, calming
irate customers down and solving everyone’s problems 24/7. I received service
calls on my work phone in the deer stand and duck blind. I remember a customer
in Forest Park asked, “Is that a duck I hear?” I told him the truth, I was in
the middle of Wappapello lake hunting! I called a mechanic and he took care of
the problem for me. People would call at 2:30am yelling at me, then I would
call to wake my mechanics up. I was once in the Lincoln Museum in Springfield,
IL and playing phone tag with mechanics and customers, it was part of the job.
To say that this job was a blessing would be an understatement. To say that
this job was beneficial for my character and traits would be a major
understatement.
Having
this job kept things stable in my life when not everything was, I tend to like structure.
If I don’t have structure then I make it. In my last job I attempted to turn
chaos into harmony. I went across the world on a mission trip to Kosovo, a
vacation in New Orleans/Gulf Shores, went on great hunts, bought new guns and
much more. During this time I went through a tragic divorce that I will choose
not to talk about. It was another major trial in my life that brought on the
feelings of embarrassment, resentment, anger, fear, and more. I had lost a spouse and
incredible family also. To be completely transparent, there were days I barely
got to work, just to come home and sleep on my living room floor by the front
door to stop thinking so much. I have seen people respond to this many ways and
with many different circumstances. There are things that I don’t think we will
ever forget or heal from, we just choose to learn and keep living. My personal
goal is to not have any amount malice toward her, and I am there. Thank God. I was able to
independently pay for my two bedroom apartment, pay off all my credit card
bills and two small college loans. Blessed. While it was one of the worst years
of my life, in many ways great things happened also. I wasn’t feeling the
position was for me in the service department because of many variables. Yet
another fork in the road of life! What to do now? I knew I wanted to work hard
all day, I wanted responsibility, I wanted to build relationships with
people and lastly wanted to keep my outdoor hobbies that bring me internal
peace. I was working 10-13 hour days and realized I stopped dreaming when I was
divorced. Insomnia took a hold of me in bouts. I was tired all time and knew I
had to make a change. At this point I thought about people that worked jobs
they hated their entire lives because they didn’t think they could make a
change. Although I didn’t hate anything, I knew I needed to create a change.
I was focusing on being financially
responsible and was looking for a way to cut my costs dramatically. I chose to move back in
with my parents at 29 years old, with their permission of course. (I can write
an entire blog about what it feels like to move back in with your parents after
college, marriage, divorce and managing good men 10-25 years my senior. Someday
I might just do that.) Fortunately my family has been the biggest blessing in
my life. My support system. They practice unconditional love and know that I
don’t plan on living with them forever. They know how much it bothers me, but they
also know it was the logical and responsible decision. I try to do repairs on
the house and not be in anyone’s way. After many conversations with God, I felt
my situation pushing me to make a major change in my short life I was given. Three
decades are gone, there is no going back in this life. I hit a point at work where I felt in my very
specific situation, it was best to look for something else full time. I’m not
saying that I recommend it, I’m just telling you what I did. I called my mom
and then my girlfriend Jessi. I told Jessi, “Hey it’s just me, if you are
dating me for money then you might want to change your mind.” I was half
joking, but she reassured me that I made the right decision and she was not
basing our relationship off of my income. So that was one thing I had going for
me. She had two great jobs within 2 miles of where she lives, yeah she is
sharp. I know that not everyone will have the opportunities I did, and I am thankful.
I respectively turned in my two weeks to my employer and chose to go out into
the world without a designated plan. I felt it was something I had to. This is
not a story about bashing an employer, I was grateful for the opportunity they
provided for me. This is a story about finding my way in this life, finding
something that can use my traits to be productive and successful. This is not a
story about getting rich, making millions or becoming famous. If we make a
leap, we must land; in much the same way as “what goes up, must come down.” This
is part one or what I call “The Leap”, part two will be “The Landing.” Follow
me on my journey. In Part two I will talk about job hunting, networking, and
tips on things I experienced.
- Austin
Remember the path of our lives will have peaks and valleys, sunshine and rain; even forks in the road. Keep moving, crawl if you have to and don't give up. A new journey begins every single day.
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